Changing perspective

Today I woke up. I wasn't hungry until noon. I drank three glasses of water before then. I cleaned the house with my boys got dressed and sat down hungry to eat a whole melon. I asked Siri "how many calories is in a cantaloupe?" She replied 187. I said , "shoot." That's so little!" Well

that's a switch. I am trying to find calories now. That's the way it should be! I realize it is calorie intake that caused some of my weight gain. However it was eating foods that caused inflammation that added to my weight. Before I couldn't read my bodies cues! I was in inflammation hell eating from addiction. My digestion is on fire now! My health is improving. Today my son said to me, " mom I know you might miss ice cream and stuff but your really nice when you eat fruit. " from the mouths of babes! 

Raw chili greatness

Made this today! Kelp noodles and delicious chili by Kristina on you tube, with go fully raw. I love her recipes! Tastes do good and cilantro heaven!

10 lbs gone

10 lbs feels like a lot. I feel Jedi thin even though 20 more would make it true. I feel motivated to move today, clean and organize, work hard, yoga and connect without shutting down. Life is easy raw once I let go of what I couldn't have and see now what I do have. I have myself back!  My cells are full of celery! My heart is pumping live juice! My life is changing on a plant based diet and I am not surprised this time! It's such a relief to know it was this all along. I jumped I to raw so many times without knowing what was actually not digesting.  The elimination  diet has brought new light to the dark, the "what if? " The "don't be to extream" repeat record in my head is gone. After the weeks of torture, turns out it's not just dairy, it's not just wheat, it's not just corn, it's not just beans, it's not just grains, it's not just soy! It's all of them boy oh boy! But I got this! Can't say I am surprised! 

Amazing experience burrito

Ok folks, so my new favorate you tube channel is fully raw Kristina because not only is she 100 percent raw and for 7 years, but she is 80 10 10 so she has these amazing recipes that fit my needs transitioning. Today, with my kids, we made burritos. It was so fun because we laughed at Kristina together. She is so funny and makes cooking enjoyable. The boys (age 11) made me play parts  of the video over and over and my one son asked to make his own. He had just brushed his teeth though for bed so he had to rain check. We are so having this for dinner Tuesday! Tomorrow I will make Kristina's raw chilli! 

It's been going great raw and I have had one slip with popcorn at the movies (hard to give that up) and French fries at a restaurant. Kristina had a great point in her blog, why pay 8$ for a salad that is a snack to a raw foodist? Series I got a salad and asked for avocados instead of cheese. They gave me a quarter of an avocados. I can eat one plus three of these salads. So sweet potatoe fries it was. I feel great though and committed to raw so that slip to me was a transitional challenge I will have to face. 

Day 4 juice fast

It is amazing what a four day juice fast can do and some exersize. 8 lbs off.  Tomorrow I will fast till noon them head into salads and fruit! Lots of fruit in my future. I feel so librated! I tried it all! It's 90 percent raw dairy meat grain processed food and soy free! I am going for it! Fuck fitting in! 

Day 3 juice fast

Today I hit a great yoga class at namaste yoga in Saratoga. It was really intense! I didn't expect it to be so but I managed pretty well. My energy level was great. The detox effect was strong. After a break and picking up some raw veggies at the farmers market my guy and I went for a three mile hike. It was a really wonderful hike but I am very tierd now! Though I may have overdone it a little, as I hiked 3 miles the day before, I feel more energy than in the past few years! It's only when I am high raw that this happens. Do you realize I have done more this weekend with less calories than in the whole winter combined? 

So have I gone through enough experimenting to know that raw is just it for me? Can I be ok with the favorate foods and dinners out gone? While the social enjoyment is amazing and the yummy flavors devine I can't help but know right now that those things are worth giving up for the way I feel and the life of energy joy and fulfillment I could have. 

One more day of juice fasting to go and then I will stay raw. The exception I want to try is miso soup, dressings but no dairy, and some fish. Everything else is gone. We will see. I also want to try eggs and see if I could still have them if I am high raw and it is not to often. It gives me more options with family. 

Watermelon strawberry basil smoothie

I was in the supermarket last night and had trouble buying fruit. It wasn't attractive. Then I saw the basil and it was love at first site. 

Watermelon 1 whole mini

1 cup coconut cream

8 strawberries

8 basil leaves 

Love it!

97 percent

Let the detox really begin! I look better, I feel better, I am better. The issue is everything has changed. When it's such a dramatic shift in how I feel everything else shifts. While I am happier for it, I am holding onto my old beliefs and it's exhausting. Transformation is scary. But I have arrived. I don't feel I am following a diet and seeing everything I can't have. I look around and see what I will feel like if I do partake and it's what I will feel like that guides my choices. Is it possible that really figuring out step by step what I digest and what I don't was the key to this the whole time? You mean going slow and observing was the way? It wasn't jumping in to 100 percent overnight. I have never been so sure that slow and steady wins the race. 

Juice fast

This weekend I planned yoga, walks and a three day juice fast. I signed up with our amazing local juice bar in Saratoga springs ny. The Saratoga juice bar was so supportive and helpful. My boyfriend even got in on it! We are both on day 2 and feel great. Yesterday was day 1 and not as hard as I thought it would be. Today I woke up a different person. I woke up happy, loving, and full of joy. If you have read this blog you know I have tried everything. Dairy free, wheat free, grain free. Palio, vegan, vegetarian. I thought I want raw but really I didn't. Today I look back and realize I have tried it all and I don't want the way I felt I want the way I feel now. Juice fasting is how I feel raw. This is what I wAnt. I don't think anything is in my way any more. I really know that nothing else works. I am considering maybe raw but with occasional fish with my family. Eggs and fish are the only things that work. 

So for me I think it's settled. I plan to keep going on the juice fast. I think till Wednesday would rock. I have to see with work and my energy. 

Also I feel excited to realize this is for me and nothing really stands in my way.

I am gas free today, there is detoxing happening, my skin glows and my body feels as it should. 

Favorate coconut milk for tea

Life is incomplete with tea honey and soy milk, then even worse almond milk. Yuck. I am sorry it's just no substitute for creamer. Then, I was in the store and the clouds cleared for this box that stood with magic qualities! My life is complete! That combined with trying decaf tea and loving had made my month. I also read up on the magical qualities of honey! Honey is a gift from the gods! Qualities like bringing in spiritual forces to ones life, rich on enzymes and vitamins, and more. Thank you honey bees, thank you coconut cream, thank you tea! 

Best smoothie ever

We call it the rainbow smoothie! 

6 frozen strawberries with green heads

I cup frozen mangoe

1 cup of coconut creamer

1 spoonful of raw coco powder

1 cup of water 

2!tbs of bee pollen

Blend well but not to much so you can see the sprinkle colors 

Back to Share

It's been a few weeks since I have written, and part of that has been these experiences that have made me consider 'Is Raw for me?'

I went to Florida for a week and waiting in the airport for five hours was difficult. Then the flying finally began. When I changed planes I had 20 minutes to eat and get back on the next plane. I had been eating high raw, dairy and grain free- but with meat and chicken. I just couldn't shake that last 5 to 10 percent cooked.  A few days before I flew out I started eating dairy again. Just some ice cream, yogurt and cheese. Between planes, I ate a burger and decided, well, why not just eat the bun? I am rushing so I will just do it. I knew I was making an excuse to do what I wanted to do.  (but didn't really on some level) I gave in.

In coach I sat close to another man. Great grandfather. Good conversation. I felt closed in though, more than other times flying. I felt dizzy from the flight. I felt itchy. I could physically feel my body taking on water. I was expanding. I was miserable. I was having a grain reaction.

In Florida I stayed high raw, but dairy and meat remained. I ate 10 mangoes in 5 days. I was in raw food heaven.

When I came back from Florida, I quit dairy. It wasn't hard at all. I was ready and having reactions. I wasn't itchy like from grains. It's truly clear that the itching and excema I grew up with was a grain allergy. I knew I needed to go dairy free. It was keeping me fat. It was effecting my mood and my memory. I could feel the change within two days. It was such a relief.

I decided to take another step. No more meat. No more animals. It was a huge difference. It made all the difference. I didn't think it would matter so much. It mattered more than dairy. I felt a huge change in my digestion.

My boyfriend and I joke. Dairy is a gateway drug to grains. Well, meat is a gateway to dairy, and the cycle begins. I was really missing this link. I feel so free now.

I was at the book store and I was looking through books. I found info on Vegan diets. I found info on the Paleo diet. Everyone loves this one currently. I found info on the Vegan Paleo diet. That's what I am going for I guess. I came to it without a book but here is a book on it.

Then I found a book on coconut flour at my house in my library. It was 10 years old. I remembered making these items before I went raw.

When I went raw everything changed. I was free, thin and happy. But after 8 months, I was out of sink with the world. I was isolated. Perhaps that means nothing now. But does it? Clearly it does. That's why I am not raw now.

Ok so, meat really effects me, dairy effects me, and grains. What else? Eggs seem ok, fruit and veg work, to many nuts doesn't, some cooked and high raw-great.

So after I went Vegan, I felt better. I also felt so gassy! That sucked, but it's passed now. It was bad. Day 4 I added coconut flour pancakes, and my bowls relaxed, and they really relaxed. I went to the bathroom a lot more and with ease. Wow? That's weird? I thought cooking wasn't good? Coconut is a big YES!

So Committed to raw? Yes, to high raw. Committed to not cooking? Yet to be determined. Coconut Flour is revolutionary. It's changing how I feel about everything. I am going to bake and cook and see how it goes. I will keep blogging my changes.

Skin

My skin changes with weather but the internal weather (digestion) truly effects me the most. Tonight I ate ripe cantaloupe. It feels refreshing, and hydrating. Interal hydration is the key to glowing skin. I can drink water but most of it goes right through me. Eat half a melon and all is right in my internal world. 

It's not just nutrition

Nutrition is a huge part of health. I have had a grain free lifestyle for about a month now and a high raw lifestyle but when I add more eggs and cheese in, as I haven't made that 100 percent commitment yet, I go on and off, things change in me. I have pin pointed it to dairy. Duh. Also to meat. Double duh. But I am fine with going a little meaty them a little dairy as long as I stay raw enough. If that changes my digestion changes and I feel unwell. Also caffeine is hard to regulate when tea and honey are oh so good. I have to go for a second cup that's decaf. 

I have been asking myself is it only nutrition. Obviously it's more than that that causes health. It's sleep, exersize, a stress free life, time in nature and so many others. For me all of those things are attractive only when I am high raw though. That's just me though. The path to health is individual. 

Back to it

Feeling so much better! Only took me three days high raw to get over that burger. It's crazy to me the amount of discomfort I felt and I finally feel well again. I think getting some green smoothies will help my bowls even more. I read this whole artical about how raw food is hard to digest and how it can cause gas and bowl issues. That may be true for some but it was clear that the burger I ate and fries were what was hard for my body to digest. When I went high raw again everything calmed down and my body balanced. Raw food is for me no matter what the books say. Trial and test wins. FYI best salad in Saratoga right now is at coffee trader! It's huge and they switch things for me. Plus the wooden bowl is nice.

Pain and consequences

Oh my it's been a week! I was not ready to travel and face my childhood home and social pressures. I managed to stay gluten free till the birthday cake arrived and it was dark in the venue I was at I figured no one was looking. 

Then I figured well I are gluten I may as well have a hamburger from Wendy's. What was I thinking or not thinking. Monday I resumed my diet with ease and thankfulness but my belly is still bloated, my throat just calming down and my bowls still in knots scream at me through the day. Tomorrow is my birthday and I plan to smoothie till a dinner of salad and soup at sushi tai. I am 80 percent raw moving toward that 100 percent seems solid after the experience I just had. It's almost to easy to slip back in and make myself ill. Luck is all I need and focus. I will get there. Fingers crossed.

Last night

A picture speaks a thousand words and this morning while I do have some bags and I do have morning face I also see a bit of health shining through. Last night I drank a lot of honey wine with Jonathan and ate some cooked veggies. I was raw 100 percent for a few days so we will see how this goes. The goal is to stay high raw without running back to cooked. I was to stay sunny and keep the health going. A little honey wine night with my man won't kill me. We had so much fun! We went for a snow pants night hike and connected with nature together drunk! My liver hurts a bit and I am a little dehydrated but I will bounce back!

All raw

I have been reading 80 10 10 and it's been inspiring and between eating 6 bananas for lunch and swooning over melon fruit in the grocery store I feel fallen for fruit. I am craving olives currently! It's going well 99 percent raw! We shall see what tomorrow brings. 

All raw

I have been reading 80 10 10 and it's been inspiring and between eating 6 bananas for lunch and swooning over melon fruit in the grocery store I feel fallen for fruit. I am craving olives currently! It's going well 99 percent raw! We shall see what tomorrow brings. 

Tierd but not hungry

Today was brilliant. H2o great. Cantaloupe breakfast, 4 banana lunch, salad dinner tiny bit of chicken. Solid. Tierd from work physically but not emotionally. It's been weeks of the opposite. Feeling huge relief and wellness forming. Night!

Anemia

Horray to anemia. After the weekend in which I basically stayed high raw but drifted off into mild dairy and chicken hear and there I realize Palio is not raw. (Dairy excluded from the Palio reference) I think the sweet potatoe here and baked potatoe there put me back in this not raw enough funk. I lost the zest, the energy. The chai addiction is back on and I want to end that. Tomorrow I am going to follow the 80 10 10 diet because I really feel it's the best option. Of course working in my new position is not helping. It limits my ability to take care of myself. I am taking iron pills now to get back on track. Tomorrow is another day. 

It's harder than one thinks

It's harder to go 100 percent raw! It's true. I make the switch for a day and feel amazing. Then I remember warm soup and hot potatoes and eggs. Then 24 hours later I feel the swelling start. The swelling is mild. It's not like when I ate grains or massive calories. My calories are still around 2,000 but this is just the beginning. This Saturday I decide 100 percent or say 90. 

Today is detox or die day

I just feel so down and detox e. Could it be the two beers last night? My face has lost it's shine. I feel a little defeated to only have lost a few pounds. I would like to go 95 percent and not eat meat or chicken too. Perhaps that is keeping the weight on. I just am having my first low energy day. I am sure it's detoxing and the emotional damage on the past few days at work. It's hard to handle stress at times when it pulls at heart strings. You can see it in my face. 

Change

It's amazing to me how much has changed in such a small amount of time. It's like I picked up where I left off at 8 months raw. Today the transition is over like I have been doing this for years. I seemed to have skipped the raw gormet all together, and went straight to fruits and vegtables. I also went from 3,000 calories or more to 2,000 and less. Again I can't help but bring up that I feel like I went from "I can't stop eating" to " I forgot to eat" and it's so freeing. Today I visited the juice bar and had a coconut smoothie and a green juice. I drank some water mid day and had a half a pear. Then I went to 50 south and had a raw gormet treat! I went with my colleague Kristin and my family joined as well. Kristin and I had the four course raw meal and loved it! As much as I did enjoy Johanna's raw meal and the amazing piano playing and ambiance of 50 south, I realize that I no longer need this type of rich food and I no longer need the social aspects of eating. I have conquered something finally. Something that has held me back from long term change. I will of course head back each month for the magical and special experience each month for fun, of course! But it's no longer essential. I am part of the club of raw and I don't really care to talk about it. I want to wear the raw tee shirt, I do, but at home as a pajama top! 

Constipation gone

Weight lose began 

My wrists, back, belly and face feel thinner

My mouth feels cleaner 

My saliva feels cleaner

My need for sleep is less and I am waking up in a happy daze verse a fog

My shoulders are looser

My hands feel thinner

Also I caught a bad cold my boyfriend and associate had, and I had a soar throat last night, tonight I am symptom free. We shall see tomorrow. I will tell ya, I am ok with being able to fight off illness easier! 

Raw and feeling it

I feel so much better! Yesterday I was 100 percent raw. Today I was 90 percent again. My man is ill so I made him chicken soup from scratch. I ate some as it's gluten free and dairy free. It felt warming in this super freezing weather! I have been keeping my calories up eating lots of snacks mainly fruit. Yesterday I watched this amazing story online of a Floridian women in her 70's who has been raw 27 years. It gave me a bit of conviction in my pocket. The conviction to live the life I want to live with the right to feel how I want to feel. I know it matters for the sake of this daily diary wether I am 100 percent or not.  But to me it matters not, only how I feel and reaching my goals. My goal truly is 90 percent and up 365 days raw. How far I take it will be up to me. I am not sick or dying so I have the time to get my health in order at a pace I determine. Those ill should consider a different path. For now, I feel amazing just where I am. 

A little note to self: on 100 percent raw with no dairy and no meat and no grains the constipation came back with sugar. I quite chai a week ago and added it in this morning. Chai is loaded with sugar. This is an addiction I wish to resolve in this process! Wish me luck. It's tasty! 

It's harder than one thinks

It's harder to go 100 percent raw! It's true. I make the switch for a day and feel amazing. Then I remember warm soup and hot potatoes and eggs. Then 24 hours later I feel the swelling start. The swelling is mild. It's not like when I ate grains or massive calories. My calories are still around 2,000 but this is just the beginning. This Saturday I decide 100 percent or say 90. 

Emotions and Johanna's raw food link

I wanted to post johannasrawfood.com and 
Thursday, January 9, 2014 from 6:00 pm to 8:00 pm at 
FIFTY SOUTH Restaurant and Bar
2128 Doubleday Avenue, Ballston Spa, NY 12020
$35 in advance, $40 at the door
RESERVE your seats early: call 518-884-2926

This will be my first dinner with Johanna at 50 south and my friend and co worker Kristin will be at the dinner too! 

Johanna has really supported me going raw last summer and still remains a friend and stops to see me and check on me every now and then even though I only went raw for a month.  

What's up today? New Years! 

Today I feel so emotional. I could punch someone and kiss someone at the same time. I hate and I love. I must be detoxing! Green smoothie time! 

Last night I survived a table of junk and stuck to celery and dip! I had a few meat balls, but still no dairy and no grains! I was really proud that I didn't feel tempted. I even had my own food in case but also ate a  huge salad before joining the party so I was full. When food came up among the ladies at the table I stuck to cool info about allergies and health ( as we were talking about our children) and didn't even mention my new lifestyle. It's my business anyway! But this proves I have changed. Long ago my motivation wasn't my own health. I thought I needed to prove to the world this diet works and be an example in order to succeed. Meaning something else besides my own health would have to drive this change. 

Apparently that was the old me. I can do this just for me and for my health. Perhaps I really will succeed finally and make this a long term lifestyle switch. I have hope. I have changed so much since I went raw for 8 months almost 4 years ago. If not, I will hope to the future, keep living, loving and learn about myself. I will get there! For now the goal is still a year! 

Fist day at work raw

It's amazing to me how easy this is. My head hurts a little and I am tierd today but I hardly thought about food at all, except when I got hungry. I was focused and clear, and my work was well thought out. I had a big salad for lunch, a snack of raw crackers and dip as well as a big apple. I am not really even hungry for dinner. This is the beginning of the detox madness! I can feel that but on the bright side I feel transitioned already emotionally. All is well.