Eggs, fish and Popcorn

As the weeks past these three items still remain. It was ok when it was one day and then a few days past without one of them but now there is one in every day of my week and I am feeling stuck. My weight is steady and my anger is high. I also don't feel as clean and inflammation free. 

Goodbye eggs, I love you but you gotta go. I gotta cut out all animal protein. It's just gotta happen. Popcorn you can stay a while. Fish your no more than once a week. That should settle things 

Simple eating and living

Simple is becoming satisfying. It's all about a good dressing and meals are golden. When I don't feel like cooking or preparing food I eat fruit. My boys watched me eat 5 oranges and smiled. I used to eat junk when I didn't feel like cooking. Now I eat the best food. My body is slowly changing. The bloating is passing. It's key to stay super high raw for me. 95 percent. It just feels better but it's ok if I still play with that. The eight is coming off and I feel ready to start exercising. 

Today I drove an hour to maple syrup country with my family to get a pancake breakfast, go for a drive and see the maple farm. I brought berries and tasted the syrup. It was a treat. I didn't want anything else. I was happy to just take in the experience. Food wasn't the reason I was there, it was to witness the miracle of tree sap. 

Butternut squash soup

There is an amazing recipe I love from the Art of Raw Living by Doreen Virtue and Jenny Rose, healing soup for the insides. It's butternut squash soup. Finding great recipes and declared that I will make time to prepare my food, it's a big bold step and I am loving it. 

Last weekend I found myself faced with that same issue going out to eat! Of course I ate things I shouldn't have by accident. I ate only Vegtables but no doubt there was butter but I am still unsure. I felt an immediate reaction and three days later with this soup I feel better than ever and back on track. 

100th note to self, this really isn't worth it call ahead to restaurants! ( cudos  to self for bringing olives in your purse)

Watermelon and I are best friends

Hydration

Sweet

A whole meal

An amazing smoothie

I love you Watermelon

It's always been true love

You have been my favorite since childhood.

5 weeks High Raw- Unveiling the Truth

   
   Taking the plunge and deciding to eat a plant based diet has never been better.  Living the way I have for the last 6 years (SAD diet) has really been a blessing, and luckily I didn't receive a major disease that was life threatening. I hit rock bottom with inflammation and a cough that lasted 3 months. I took control of my own health and now I feel alive and invigorated five weeks into a high raw and all plant based diet. I feel like I have finally faced my major food issues and taken control. I don't miss a single food, because I don't miss how I used to feel. I miss certain flavors but not the way  the SAD diet foods made me feel. I am about 90% raw and 100% most days. I am still in transition and taking it slow. This time around, I want to transform my lifestyle instead of diet.

    Yesterday I had a moment where I felt I was finally through the first phase of transition. I ate 2 grapefruits and 5 oranges for lunch. Satisfied. My fellow colleagues watched me with jaws dropped. This is not a show, this is me gaining control of my health.  "What a weird way to eat, are you crazy?" This is not a question I have not heard before, it's this time, I don't care. I am not crazy, though, just different. We all need different things to sustain ourselves and stay well. For me, it's a plant based diet. No matter what I do, it always comes right back to that conclusion.

     Last time I was raw, about 6 years ago, I was young, stupid and had no idea what I was doing. I ate a high fat diet and little fruit. About 9 months into raw 6 years ago, I began to discover fruit based dieting. I left the diet at about 11 months or a year. It is crazy I did this. I had come so far. But I hadn't faced myself and what diet meant to me. I hadn't faced going out to eat and being alone on this diet. Now I could care less. Sure, it's nice to have friends who eat a high plant based diet, but I would rather be alone and happy then with folks eating out and fat with pain.

    So, my first mono meal went well and I am off into the land of high fruit as I go through the second phase of transition.

      I should also mention I have not given up cooked vegetables, baked sweet potatoes or fish at this time. I don't eat them often, but it's my 'go to' as I transition and I find that it allows me to go out to eat with my family and fiancée. It just makes sense to go slowly and allow myself to do this if I need to instead of going 100% uncooked overnight! Silly to do that. This is a much better option. Life is good. I feel in control and I finally feel I can do this safely and with success. This blog was started about a year ago and my goal was to be raw. I stopped blogging when I went back to a cooked food (SAD) diet, only I kept a mostly vegetarian diet gluten free. Honestly, it seemed like I had lost my way, in fact, I had just truly started. With the knowledge I gained from jumping in about a year ago, I relized a plant based diet was for me. Going through the "elimination diet" really proved to me that it wasn't just gluten, or just dairy, or just meat, that caused my issues, it was all of them and that was meaningful for me to experience. I got to really see the effects of each food on my own body and it confirmed for me I was correct all along. A plant based diet was for me. So I took a year to make baby steps toward raw.

    In that year I found peace with this diet, and I found out I didn't have to be 100% to be 100% well. I just needed to be high raw most of the time. I also faced my issues with eating out, and with my family. I learned to cook and found the strength to learn to prepare healthy foods both cooked and raw. I learned to make dressing! It was a happy day!

    This is the beginning, but it's been a year of slow changes that has lead up to this transition and I am proud that I took a whole year to get here. I only wish I would have blogged through my challenge months. I suppose I was afraid to write about facing the emotional parts of eating.  But coming out on the other side, I am so glad that I kept as much of a journal of my journey back to a plant based diet. I know my body now and I understanding my mind. I am not afraid to fail. I won't ever zig zag back to a SAD diet. I have been gluten free a year, dairy free two months, and I have been moving toward this for months. I can't go back, I have changed from within.  I suppose I will have to explain this to others. I will have to explain why it's different this time around. It's different because I am ready to be healthy. This is something people don't realize. You can't just want to be thin, want to feel a little better and then go back to eating a SAD diet. You have to want to be healthy and believe you are worth that. This is the emotional part of this diet that some people have to face and it's what I had to face. FACED, onto the BLISS.

It's been a year and I am back to it

I stopped blogging when things didn't go as planned. My one year raw turned into a almost there to raw and OVER.  I learned a lot about each food I stopped eating on it's on and I really saw changes. I didn't, however, make it to getting rid of meat. Gaining weight seemed inevitable. Turns out meat is a big part of my weight issue, or so it seems in my latest experiment.

Flash forward gaining another 10 1bs back and another new 10 lbs on- heading full forwarding into back to normal. Lots of dairy and meat. I went gluten free 9 months ago. That has stuck- mostly because I just can't go back to eating gluten. I get so sick. But lots of meat and dairy and grains ruled my world.

I got sick 3 months ago with a very strong illness- just a cough that wouldn't go away, with a fever.  It has sucked. It came and went for the last 3 months and 3 doses of antibiotics later- I am done. About a week ago I became a vegetarian. Vegan I guess- No dairy, Only Gluten Free grains, No meat. Low and behold, down 5 lbs. The happiness I feel is overwhelming.

For me it wasn't being fat that did it this time, it was losing my beauty and feeling like I could cause my own sickness and might not be able to undo it. My motivation is truly to get my health back- something I took for granted, and to get my figure back. I want to live again and be happy. Cheers to the possibilities of a happy life. It's not what I don't get to eat, it's how I get to feel while I really live.

Changing perspective

Today I woke up. I wasn't hungry until noon. I drank three glasses of water before then. I cleaned the house with my boys got dressed and sat down hungry to eat a whole melon. I asked Siri "how many calories is in a cantaloupe?" She replied 187. I said , "shoot." That's so little!" Well

that's a switch. I am trying to find calories now. That's the way it should be! I realize it is calorie intake that caused some of my weight gain. However it was eating foods that caused inflammation that added to my weight. Before I couldn't read my bodies cues! I was in inflammation hell eating from addiction. My digestion is on fire now! My health is improving. Today my son said to me, " mom I know you might miss ice cream and stuff but your really nice when you eat fruit. " from the mouths of babes! 

Raw chili greatness

Made this today! Kelp noodles and delicious chili by Kristina on you tube, with go fully raw. I love her recipes! Tastes do good and cilantro heaven!

10 lbs gone

10 lbs feels like a lot. I feel Jedi thin even though 20 more would make it true. I feel motivated to move today, clean and organize, work hard, yoga and connect without shutting down. Life is easy raw once I let go of what I couldn't have and see now what I do have. I have myself back!  My cells are full of celery! My heart is pumping live juice! My life is changing on a plant based diet and I am not surprised this time! It's such a relief to know it was this all along. I jumped I to raw so many times without knowing what was actually not digesting.  The elimination  diet has brought new light to the dark, the "what if? " The "don't be to extream" repeat record in my head is gone. After the weeks of torture, turns out it's not just dairy, it's not just wheat, it's not just corn, it's not just beans, it's not just grains, it's not just soy! It's all of them boy oh boy! But I got this! Can't say I am surprised! 

Amazing experience burrito

Ok folks, so my new favorate you tube channel is fully raw Kristina because not only is she 100 percent raw and for 7 years, but she is 80 10 10 so she has these amazing recipes that fit my needs transitioning. Today, with my kids, we made burritos. It was so fun because we laughed at Kristina together. She is so funny and makes cooking enjoyable. The boys (age 11) made me play parts  of the video over and over and my one son asked to make his own. He had just brushed his teeth though for bed so he had to rain check. We are so having this for dinner Tuesday! Tomorrow I will make Kristina's raw chilli! 

It's been going great raw and I have had one slip with popcorn at the movies (hard to give that up) and French fries at a restaurant. Kristina had a great point in her blog, why pay 8$ for a salad that is a snack to a raw foodist? Series I got a salad and asked for avocados instead of cheese. They gave me a quarter of an avocados. I can eat one plus three of these salads. So sweet potatoe fries it was. I feel great though and committed to raw so that slip to me was a transitional challenge I will have to face. 

Day 4 juice fast

It is amazing what a four day juice fast can do and some exersize. 8 lbs off.  Tomorrow I will fast till noon them head into salads and fruit! Lots of fruit in my future. I feel so librated! I tried it all! It's 90 percent raw dairy meat grain processed food and soy free! I am going for it! Fuck fitting in! 

Day 3 juice fast

Today I hit a great yoga class at namaste yoga in Saratoga. It was really intense! I didn't expect it to be so but I managed pretty well. My energy level was great. The detox effect was strong. After a break and picking up some raw veggies at the farmers market my guy and I went for a three mile hike. It was a really wonderful hike but I am very tierd now! Though I may have overdone it a little, as I hiked 3 miles the day before, I feel more energy than in the past few years! It's only when I am high raw that this happens. Do you realize I have done more this weekend with less calories than in the whole winter combined? 

So have I gone through enough experimenting to know that raw is just it for me? Can I be ok with the favorate foods and dinners out gone? While the social enjoyment is amazing and the yummy flavors devine I can't help but know right now that those things are worth giving up for the way I feel and the life of energy joy and fulfillment I could have. 

One more day of juice fasting to go and then I will stay raw. The exception I want to try is miso soup, dressings but no dairy, and some fish. Everything else is gone. We will see. I also want to try eggs and see if I could still have them if I am high raw and it is not to often. It gives me more options with family. 

Watermelon strawberry basil smoothie

I was in the supermarket last night and had trouble buying fruit. It wasn't attractive. Then I saw the basil and it was love at first site. 

Watermelon 1 whole mini

1 cup coconut cream

8 strawberries

8 basil leaves 

Love it!

97 percent

Let the detox really begin! I look better, I feel better, I am better. The issue is everything has changed. When it's such a dramatic shift in how I feel everything else shifts. While I am happier for it, I am holding onto my old beliefs and it's exhausting. Transformation is scary. But I have arrived. I don't feel I am following a diet and seeing everything I can't have. I look around and see what I will feel like if I do partake and it's what I will feel like that guides my choices. Is it possible that really figuring out step by step what I digest and what I don't was the key to this the whole time? You mean going slow and observing was the way? It wasn't jumping in to 100 percent overnight. I have never been so sure that slow and steady wins the race. 

Juice fast

This weekend I planned yoga, walks and a three day juice fast. I signed up with our amazing local juice bar in Saratoga springs ny. The Saratoga juice bar was so supportive and helpful. My boyfriend even got in on it! We are both on day 2 and feel great. Yesterday was day 1 and not as hard as I thought it would be. Today I woke up a different person. I woke up happy, loving, and full of joy. If you have read this blog you know I have tried everything. Dairy free, wheat free, grain free. Palio, vegan, vegetarian. I thought I want raw but really I didn't. Today I look back and realize I have tried it all and I don't want the way I felt I want the way I feel now. Juice fasting is how I feel raw. This is what I wAnt. I don't think anything is in my way any more. I really know that nothing else works. I am considering maybe raw but with occasional fish with my family. Eggs and fish are the only things that work. 

So for me I think it's settled. I plan to keep going on the juice fast. I think till Wednesday would rock. I have to see with work and my energy. 

Also I feel excited to realize this is for me and nothing really stands in my way.

I am gas free today, there is detoxing happening, my skin glows and my body feels as it should. 

Favorate coconut milk for tea

Life is incomplete with tea honey and soy milk, then even worse almond milk. Yuck. I am sorry it's just no substitute for creamer. Then, I was in the store and the clouds cleared for this box that stood with magic qualities! My life is complete! That combined with trying decaf tea and loving had made my month. I also read up on the magical qualities of honey! Honey is a gift from the gods! Qualities like bringing in spiritual forces to ones life, rich on enzymes and vitamins, and more. Thank you honey bees, thank you coconut cream, thank you tea! 

Best smoothie ever

We call it the rainbow smoothie! 

6 frozen strawberries with green heads

I cup frozen mangoe

1 cup of coconut creamer

1 spoonful of raw coco powder

1 cup of water 

2!tbs of bee pollen

Blend well but not to much so you can see the sprinkle colors 

Back to Share

It's been a few weeks since I have written, and part of that has been these experiences that have made me consider 'Is Raw for me?'

I went to Florida for a week and waiting in the airport for five hours was difficult. Then the flying finally began. When I changed planes I had 20 minutes to eat and get back on the next plane. I had been eating high raw, dairy and grain free- but with meat and chicken. I just couldn't shake that last 5 to 10 percent cooked.  A few days before I flew out I started eating dairy again. Just some ice cream, yogurt and cheese. Between planes, I ate a burger and decided, well, why not just eat the bun? I am rushing so I will just do it. I knew I was making an excuse to do what I wanted to do.  (but didn't really on some level) I gave in.

In coach I sat close to another man. Great grandfather. Good conversation. I felt closed in though, more than other times flying. I felt dizzy from the flight. I felt itchy. I could physically feel my body taking on water. I was expanding. I was miserable. I was having a grain reaction.

In Florida I stayed high raw, but dairy and meat remained. I ate 10 mangoes in 5 days. I was in raw food heaven.

When I came back from Florida, I quit dairy. It wasn't hard at all. I was ready and having reactions. I wasn't itchy like from grains. It's truly clear that the itching and excema I grew up with was a grain allergy. I knew I needed to go dairy free. It was keeping me fat. It was effecting my mood and my memory. I could feel the change within two days. It was such a relief.

I decided to take another step. No more meat. No more animals. It was a huge difference. It made all the difference. I didn't think it would matter so much. It mattered more than dairy. I felt a huge change in my digestion.

My boyfriend and I joke. Dairy is a gateway drug to grains. Well, meat is a gateway to dairy, and the cycle begins. I was really missing this link. I feel so free now.

I was at the book store and I was looking through books. I found info on Vegan diets. I found info on the Paleo diet. Everyone loves this one currently. I found info on the Vegan Paleo diet. That's what I am going for I guess. I came to it without a book but here is a book on it.

Then I found a book on coconut flour at my house in my library. It was 10 years old. I remembered making these items before I went raw.

When I went raw everything changed. I was free, thin and happy. But after 8 months, I was out of sink with the world. I was isolated. Perhaps that means nothing now. But does it? Clearly it does. That's why I am not raw now.

Ok so, meat really effects me, dairy effects me, and grains. What else? Eggs seem ok, fruit and veg work, to many nuts doesn't, some cooked and high raw-great.

So after I went Vegan, I felt better. I also felt so gassy! That sucked, but it's passed now. It was bad. Day 4 I added coconut flour pancakes, and my bowls relaxed, and they really relaxed. I went to the bathroom a lot more and with ease. Wow? That's weird? I thought cooking wasn't good? Coconut is a big YES!

So Committed to raw? Yes, to high raw. Committed to not cooking? Yet to be determined. Coconut Flour is revolutionary. It's changing how I feel about everything. I am going to bake and cook and see how it goes. I will keep blogging my changes.

Skin

My skin changes with weather but the internal weather (digestion) truly effects me the most. Tonight I ate ripe cantaloupe. It feels refreshing, and hydrating. Interal hydration is the key to glowing skin. I can drink water but most of it goes right through me. Eat half a melon and all is right in my internal world. 

It's not just nutrition

Nutrition is a huge part of health. I have had a grain free lifestyle for about a month now and a high raw lifestyle but when I add more eggs and cheese in, as I haven't made that 100 percent commitment yet, I go on and off, things change in me. I have pin pointed it to dairy. Duh. Also to meat. Double duh. But I am fine with going a little meaty them a little dairy as long as I stay raw enough. If that changes my digestion changes and I feel unwell. Also caffeine is hard to regulate when tea and honey are oh so good. I have to go for a second cup that's decaf. 

I have been asking myself is it only nutrition. Obviously it's more than that that causes health. It's sleep, exersize, a stress free life, time in nature and so many others. For me all of those things are attractive only when I am high raw though. That's just me though. The path to health is individual.